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Stories of Inspiration
Please take a moment to read some stories of inspiration from our clients.
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“Brittany's Story”
Story from "Haley"
John's Story
Cindy's Story
David's Story
“Brittany's Story”
Story from "Haley"
John's Story
OCD makes life so much harder than it should be. If it is not one thing it’s another. After I do a compulsion I gain temporary relief, but hours, sometimes even minutes later the obsession crops us again in a worse form. Exposure and ritual prevention therapy, I find, is the real solution to get a handle on OCD.
Some of the obsessions included: 1) A fear of being gay or damned (doomed); 2) A fear of not living a good Christian life; 3) A fear that other Christians may advise me to dispose of my collections and try to control my life; 4) A fear of not being normal; 5) A fear that if I don’t deposit money in my checking account daily that I will not have a secure bank account.
These are only some of my obsessions, many of which are
linked to religion. I feared that I had to live a “perfect” Christian life. This resulted in compulsions and drastic changes in my life. The OCD created it’s own standard and, I followed. When I thought about my DVD’s, I feared that having these “worldly things” would cause Christians to advise me to purify my life by disposing of them….so I did it on my own. When I thought about my fear of being gay, I thought I would not make it into heaven, so I confessed my sins and, would purge more of my possessions. The problem was, it never helped. I purged everything I owned except my bedroom furniture and clothing. I lost thousands of dollars in computers, cell phones, DVD’s, personal items, and so forth.
In an effort to reclaim my life, I researched all I could on OCD and learned about Exposure Therapy. I had no idea how it would change my life. I began with buying one item at a time and began to bring them home to my room. I learned to sit with my fear that others would not see me as a worthy Christian. I limited depositing money into my checking account, did not go on-line to verify the balance, and did not pay bills as soon as they came in. I was able to put labels on movies “not perfectly,” and keep them in my room without discarding them. Each time I sat with my fears I found that what I was so scared of never even existed. None of my fears ever happened.
I have reached many great milestones in my life. After spending only a few weeks in Intensive Outpatient Treatment, I was discharged and now follow up once per week with individual and group therapy for support. I have the tools to apply when needed, understanding that doing compulsions only provides temporary relief and feeds the condition. Sitting with my anxiety and accepting the feared consequences has helped to desensitize me and change my life. I am someone who can manage my OCD and hope that through my story, others will see there is hope.
Cindy's Story
My OCD started in the 5th grade when I believed my parents were trying to poison me. Every night before bed, I asked for a glass of water, and would take a sip while calculating the number of hours until the poison would kill me.
This is just one example of the strange compulsions and haunting images I had to endure. While in Hawaii during Christmas of my 6th grade year, I saw a TV. show on MTV called “True Life: I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder”. The hour-long television segment followed the life of three young men and women (around their 20’s), dealing with everyday battles related to OCD. I watched the program for about 3 minutes and turned it off. I was scared out of my mind. It was all too realistic and close to the same things that were going on inside my head. From that point on, I told my parents that I thought I had Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. I knew very little about the condition, because when you are of a young age like I was, you do not know what is considered “normal”. You do not know if millions of other kids are scared of killing someone when they hold a knife in their hands, which was another one of my fears. You do not know if these horrible thoughts and images pass through other people’s minds.
Middle school continued, and my OCD seemed to get better. Whenever I did do something strange, I’d mention it to my mom. She would reply with “Okay sweetheart. If it ever gets too much for you to handle we’ll get you some help.” Slowly my compulsions began to get out of hand. I couldn’t watch TV unless the volume was at an even number. I couldn’t walk into my bathroom without first turning on one light switch then the second. I couldn’t run or exercise without holding my tongue to the roof of my mouth, or feel the need to constantly squeeze my toes to the bottom of my shoes. I joined a competitive cheerleading team, and traveled to compete with amazing teams of girls. That brought a lot of stress which fed my anxiety, which boosted my OCD. I would have to run through the routine perfectly three times without messing up due to fear that I might get injured or injure someone else.
When freshman year of high school came and went, things started too look a little better. I made captain of my cheerleading squad, participated in volunteer work for a local charity and met new friends. However, the summer before my sophomore year, things began to spiral again. I was named cheerleading captain again, but this time it would fuel my OCD. I would count at practices and have to do weird rituals with the numbers as I counted. I became increasingly depressed and had thoughts of death and loneliness.
I told my parents how unbearable my OCD had become and asked for help. My mom searched for the correct way to deal with my disorder. We found The Anxiety Treatment Center and through Exposure and Ritual Prevention techniques my OCD got better. This form of behavioral therapy, combined with Zoloft, allowed me to overcome my constant and torturing fears. I am no longer in therapy and currently maintain a 4.2 GPA. I continue to be Captain of my cheerleading squad, and I am now President of the charity I referenced earlier. I am no longer depressed, and have my life back. I am now in charge, not my OCD!
David's Story
Hypochondriasis and Scrupulosity
My OCD became evident and disruptive to me, and my family’s life, in February of 2000. Shortly after the birth of my son, I was hospitalized with internal bleeding. After being released, a sense of constant anxiety over fears of health, death, and my standing with God became intrusive to my everyday life. Looking back, I now realize that they were obsessive thoughts. It took until July 2002 before I decided that enough was enough and I needed to get some help finding out what was going on with my thinking. Frustration set in. I bounced along from therapist to therapist until one of them introduced me to the concept of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP), but she did not specialize in these areas of treatment. She suggested a few books and sent me on my way.
After doing some research on CBT and ERP, the concepts resonated with what I was going through. The treatment course that I was on was not working, and I decided that I needed to do something different. Unfortunately, it took until 2007 before I was able to find someone that had expertise in this area of treatment. Until then, I spent thousands of dollars, and hours, looking for someone that specialized in CBT and ERP. I contacted “Best Seller” authors as well as other “well known” published experts. Luckily my quests lead me to the Anxiety Treatment Center. The treatment that I have been pursuing with Dr Zasio has done more for me in the last 7 months than all of the treatment I received in the last 8 years.
The goal of sharing my story is to help others realize that there is hope. What I was doing wasn’t working and if I can help even one person find their way to managing OCD, I will have been successful.
I have learned that “feelings are not facts and that I’m more powerful than my fears."
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